Out of sight but not out of mind? Cute. Guess that old saying stuck with you since I clearly made a bigger dent in your psyche than I thought.

Can’t blame you though since I personally ensured your birthday is now permanently branded with the memory of me. You’re welcome. That was my gift to you: the gift that keeps on giving… like a rash.

Honestly, I figured you’d have grown a brain cell or two since our little encounter. I mean, there was hope… But nah, you keep setting the bar lower. You were already ancient back then, and now you’re practically a fossil, yet wisdom still gave you the cold shoulder.

And here you are, back for more, like some stray mutt sniffing around for scraps. I dragged you through the dirt, exposed your fake little act, your pity parade, and apparently, that just made you hungrier for attention. Sad, really.

But let me be clear: I’m done. No more games. If you want a sliver of acknowledgment from me, maybe write a check. Maybe. Until then, go cry on your inflatable little latex boy’s shoulder. I’m sure he’s full of hot air… just like you.